All Too Well
by Lemon-Drop24
Summary: "He finally lowered her to the grass, and planted a kiss on her lips. I couldn't watch anymore. Gathering up my notes, I swept off to the cool air of the dungeons, trying to forget her happiness and my pain." Severus views his relationship with Lily through the years. Oneshot. Songfic, based off of Taylor Swift's "All Too Well".


_Hey readers! Thanks for opening up this story, I honestly, truly, appreciate it. Hope you enjoy!_**  
**

**Disclaimer:** I am in no way J.K. Rowling, and I do not own the Harry Potter characters. If I did, I'd be rich!

* * *

"And this here is Petunia's room," a nine-year-old Lily said, opening an intimidating white door for me.

"What are you doing in here?" Petunia herself shrieked, surprising Lily and me in to dropping whatever was in our hands at the time. Lily, the sticks we had been using as "wands" a few minutes ago in the woods; me, my tattered old scarf that was a few years too well worn. "Get OUT!" She yelled with surprising volume for such a small, bony girl.

Lily, feebly attempting to apologize, begged, "I'm really sorry, Tun-" but is cut off.

"Stay _out_ of my room, and keep _him _out of the house!" She spat before slamming the door in our pale faces.

Those possessions showed up on the floor of Lily's room that night.

Lily never gave them back to me.

* * *

"Hey Sev!" Lily shouts, her face barely visible due to the large waves of red blowing in front of it. "Bet you can't beat me to the park!"

I grin, my twelve-year-old face bright with prospect of a challenge. "You're on!" I yell back.

We pedal hard, Lily on her bike, me on Petunia's. We had become masters of evading her piercing eyes after all these summers together. She looks behind her to check the standing, I'm a good bike-and-a-half behind her, not noticing the fact that she's pedaling right for the biggest intersection on our route.

"Lily! Stop!" I shout, and she stops, just noticing that she was about 8 feet from being plowed down.

She smiles at me gratefully. "Thanks."

* * *

"What is this?" I asked, showing Lily a picture of herself at 6-years old, wearing a shirt donning the words "The Tigers", and holding something that looked like a longer version of a beater's bat.

"Oh, that's me in my tee-ball uniform. Muggle sport. I was terrible at it, believe it or not. Worse than I am at Quidditch." She responds without any self-consciousness.

"I find that hard to believe," I say. After being at Hogwarts with Lily for 4 years, I know that she is dreadful at Quidditch. She couldn't even get her broom to fly up at her call during the flying lesson First Year.

She playfully shoves me, releasing the picture from my grip before heading into the kitchen for a snack.

* * *

"Lily, please, please-" I begged, following her to Potions.

"Two words, Snape. Sod! Off!" She quipped, not even turning to face me.

"I'm so sorry Lily, I never meant it I swear!" I promised, not even getting the time of day. I fumbled to a stop at the corner by the door to the classroom, noticing the Marauders waiting there. Upon seeing Lily, Potter lifted his arm to put it around her shoulder in condolence.

My only comfort was that she shoved the arm off and repeated the line that she said to me not 20 seconds ago.

"Two words, Potter. Sod! Off!"

I entered the classroom after them, trying to forget all events that transpired.

* * *

I wasn't focusing on my N.E.W.T's notes. The warm June air was whipping off the lake, and it was too beautiful outside to study. It didn't help that I was settled under a tree, notes in my lap, staring off at a couple in the distance.

The girl was running away from the boy, her bright red locks flying behind her. The boy was taller than her, his messy black hair getting even more mussed up by the wind. They ran around for a few more minutes, until he finally grabbed her around the waist, hoisting her over his shoulder. She playfully kicked around, almost knocking his round glasses off his face, but both were laughing, and anyone could tell that the girl wasn't making too much effort to be put down.

He finally lowered her to the grass, and planted a kiss on her lips. I couldn't watch anymore. Gathering up my notes, a swept off to the cool air of the dungeons, trying to forget her happiness and my pain.

* * *

I stood on Platform 9 ¾ , watching Lily rummage around in her trunk. Potter held it open for her, trying to help her find something she wanted to show her family and friends. I wasn't ready to leave yet, something felt wrong about leaving before Lily did.

I watched nonchalantly, not wanting anyone, especially Potter, to notice me watching his girlfriend. Something caught my eye though lying misplaced in the trunk of things collected over 7 years at wizarding school.

_"What are you doing in here?" Petunia herself shrieked, surprising Lily and me in to dropping whatever was in our hands at the time. Lily, the sticks we had been using as "wands" a few minutes ago in the woods; me, my tattered old scarf that was a few years too well worn. "Get OUT!" She yelled with surprising volume for such a small, bony girl._

The scarf lay strewn over several books marked with things such as "Advanced Potion Making", and "1000 Magical Herbs and Fungi". I knew it was mine. Lily's family was well off enough that she would never have worn such a monstrosity. Besides, she had her Gryffindor scarves.

She kept it. After everything, she kept the scarf. Maybe there was hope for us. Maybe she could be my friend, maybe she could realize that Potter wasn't worth her time, maybe she would know that she belonged with _me_.

My thoughts were broken about two seconds later by intense squealing coming from Alice Prewitt, Marlene McKinnon, and Mrs. Evans. Lily was holding open a box with a diamond, a rather large diamond, ring inside it. Potter had her clutched to his chest, and both him and Lily had identical grins.

It was too much. I did what I always did when I saw them doing anything that marked how happy _they _were, and how sad _I _was. I walked away, this time from the Platform for the very last time.

* * *

I now stumble into the house at Godric's Hollow, no longer holding back the feelings that I had so successfully held from the Dark Lord minutes ago. Lily Evans, now Potter, is dead. She died, hating me, and everything I stood for. I hold her limp body to my chest, sobbing out everything I had ever wanted to say to her, but never did. I remember the 9-year-old girl who showed me her home, the 12-year old who nearly got hit by a car in competition, the 14-year-old who gladly shared her past, the 15-year-old who detested me more than she detested Potter himself, the 17-year-old who _loved_ him, and the woman that married him. I cry everything out, the anguish feasting at my heart. Because after everything that has transpired between us these past 11 years, I remember it all too well.

* * *

_I almost cried writing that last part, I have to say. I really think that Snape was a good person at heart, despite everything that he's done wrong for our poor protagonists._

_I had to remove the lyrics from the song, due to the Content Guidlines. Thanks go to **catspats31 **for letting me know._

_Thanks for reading, and I would love a review!_


End file.
